Muses of South Limburg

By Pam Falger

Before our son, Jeremy, left for a semester in Finland in early January, he installed Skype on my computer. I had avoided Skype for a long time, thinking it was yet another “high-tech wonder” I could easily live without. Was I ever wrong! In the past 3 weeks, I have been Skyping both Jeremy, in Helsinki, and Andrew, in Leuven, on a regular basis and I love it! Seeing my boys is one of the things that keeps me going these days.

And now I have added Abdoul to my Skype list too. Abdoul Dieng is a friend from the Ivory Coast whom I met when I was in graduate school in the States in 1979. He had come to the University of Illinois for a year to work on his Masters degree with a group of French architecture students. We all became close friends and had some wild times together, moments I will always treasure.

Though my contact with Abdoul was limited in the years following grad school, the wonder of email changed all that. We often wrote about how nice it would be if our families could meet, and in the summer of 2008, it finally happened. Abdoul, his wife Elisa, and their children, Soraya and Yerim, came to visit us in Schin op Geul. In the 3 or 4 days we spent together, Elisa became a sister to me, and Soraya and Yerim the niece and nephew I’d never had. It was, indeed, a joyful reunion! Little did either of us know what hardships would lie ahead.

I Skyped Abdoul a few weeks ago. Perhaps it was my imagination, or perhaps it was the computer reflecting a less than perfect image, but when I saw Abdoul, it seemed as if he had aged considerably in the 3 years since we last met. On the other hand, that’s not surprising, considering all of the crises he’s going through at the moment.

When the civil war broke out in the Ivory Coast a few years ago, Abdoul was forced to close down his atelier in Abijdan and seek work elsewhere. His search took him to a number of different countries before he found work in a bank in Tunisia. Though far from home and his family, Abdoul was happy to have a job at all. That all changed when he returned from Christmas vacation to find himself in the midst of yet another civil war. Though the much-hated president has fled the country, there are still militias roving the streets of Tunis, terrorizing the population and forcing Abdoul and his colleagues to remain inside their homes or offices most of the time.

A year or two ago, after their daughter, Soraya, completed high school, Abdoul and Elisa sent her to France, where they had family, to be sure that she would be safe and able to start her university studies uninterrupted. She was in Toulouse for a while, but moved to Lyon in the course of the last year. When I  heard that, my first thought was to contact Barbara Marienbach, another friend from graduate school in Illinois who has lived in Lyon for several years. Barbara immediately agreed to meet Soraya and to act as a kind of “surrogate mom” to Soraya, much to Abdoul’s, Elisa’s, and my relief.

Yet, Elisa and son Yerim (18) remain in Abidjan, which is an even bigger powder keg than Tunis at the moment. The present dictator has made it clear that he will not hesitate to take whatever (violent) measures are necessary to save his a**.  Abdoul has told Elisa to prepare to flee the country, but she refuses to.  Despite having been diagnosed with a brain tumor herself last year, she is the sole caretaker of her aging parents. One of her sisters recently underwent surgery and is also being cared for by Elisa. Despite Abdoul’s pleas, Elisa refuses to leave her ailing parents and sister behind. Nor is she willing to send her only son off to Europe somewhere by himself. Apparently, Yerim has been raised in a very protective environment, not unlike my Andrew, and she is afraid to let him go.  While I can totally relate to what she is feeling, Abdoul is, understandably, beside himself with worry. His words to me last night were: “Okay, half of Elisa’s life and my life are over, but I need to save my kids.”  When I heard that, it was all I could do not to burst out in tears.

It goes without saying that my heart goes out to Abdoul and his family.  Yet, I feel quite helpless, for my current state of health prevents me from doing much more than listening to him tell his story. A story that Abdoul — dear friend that he is — would rather not burden me with. But that’s what friends are for, right?

So now I turn to you, my friends, with a plea. I hope it won’t be necessary. I hope that the political situation in the Ivory Coast will miraculously change so that Elisa and Yerim can stay in Abidjan without fearing for their lives, so that Soraya and Abdoul can return home, to their beloved family, and live happily and safely for years to come. That’s what I hope for and — who knows? — that may eventually happen. For the moment, however, the odds are against it. The reality is that, regardless of his mother’s wishes, Yerim may need to flee his country and find refuge elsewhere. Somewhere safe. Somewhere with a family that, preferably, speaks French but, more importantly, that can empathize with his situation and make him feel welcome. Is there anybody out there who can do this for him?

To be honest, I haven’t thought this out very well. I’m merely reacting emotionally. I don’t know how long Yerim would need refuge for. Perhaps a few months? He would most likely first go to Paris, where Abdoul has a brother. But his brother lives alone and works. Besides, Abdoul is not very impressed with the part of Paris where his brother lives, so staying with him for more than a few weeks is not an option.

Everyone in Abdoul’s family has dual nationality and two passports, one from Ivory Coast and one from France. So the “legality” of Yerim staying in Europe is not at all an issue. Yerim speaks little, if any, English, so this would be a good opportunity for him to learn the language. I don’t know how good a student he is, but I do know that Yerim is a very warm, gentle young man, rather shy, but eager to please.

Well, that’s it, I guess. A somewhat vague plea on behalf of a family in desperate need of help. There are, no doubt, thousands of other families, in the Ivory Coast and elsewhere, who are also in need of such help. I just happen to know this one family. If we start by helping them, maybe others will follow our example.

Please, if this is something you are interested in pursuing, contact me. I will then put you into contact with Abdoul.

On behalf of the entire Dieng family, my deepest thanks.

Pam Falger

pamfalger@gmail.com

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Book presentation of “The Adventures of Yin & Yang: Snoepje and the Pizza Box” on Sunday, November 21st at Selexyz Dominicanen in Maastricht, by American author Susan Hermse Schaefer and Dutch Minister of Immigration and former mayor of Maastricht Gerd Leers.

The Adventures of Yin & Yang: Snoepje and the Pizza Box is the first in a cat-centric series about two aging felines sharing a cozy Minnesota life with their humans, and a cuddly newcomer named Snoepje . In English and Dutch. Illustrated.

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Source: Maastricht Region website

When I came back from Paris last Sunday, I found a copy of the first edition of X, a new magazine for “expats working, living and studying in the Southeast Netherlands”, waiting for me in the mail.

I was looking forward to it, because I was curious to find out how my short profile and photograph had turned out in the “Home is where the heart is” section of the magazine, in which five expats are invited to share their favourite spots in the region.

I knew that my Portuguese friend Cláudia Vaz was also featured in the magazine and I smiled when I saw our portraits and quotes about the places we recommended to visit in Maastricht: in my case, the Selexyz Dominicanen bookshop, rated the “fairest in the world” by the British Guardian newspaper back in 2008, and for Cláudia, the terrace at Café Zuid near the Meuse river, where she likes to come and relax in the summer months.

When I was invited a few months ago to contribute to the new magazine, I was given a general outline and description of the initiative: “X is published by the Brainport International Community and co-financed by the Dutch Ministry of Economic Affairs, the Provinces of North Brabant and Limburg and the city region of Eindhoven. It is a 68 page full-colour lively, eye-catching and dynamic guide for highly-educated, active, curious and ambitious expats who enjoy new ventures but don’t know their way around in the region yet.”

Mission accomplished! I would say. X is an easy and pleasant read, bursting with engaging expats’ stories and enticing tips, an often candid sense of humour and witty features playing on the name of the magazine: “Xpat Vs Xpat”, “Xplore”, “Xpert”, “Xtra”.

In fact, the letter X is well xploited (sorry, couldn’t help it!) in the magazine’s layout and gives it an energetic feel throughout.

In this first edition 2010-2011, the magazine mainly focuses on the cities of Eindhoven and Maastricht and their surroundings (Brainport Region and Maastricht Region). The feature articles “Xplore Eindhoven” and “Xplore Maastricht” take readers through a day out in the two cities, with a list of things to do and to see and addresses to check out.

To me, X is a welcome addition to the existing resources for expats in the Netherlands, because it targets the more specific, not insignificant and yet often forgotten international community living in the southeastern corner of the country.

With feature articles such as “Yes, it’s homemade”, “Xperts” and “Let’s go out”, where typical or innovative regional products (Limburg vlaai, ASML chip machine) and activities (Dutch Design Week, TEFAF) are placed in the spotlight, this new publication clearly wants to take up the challenge to put the Southeast Netherlands on the national and international map.

In any case, the airports of Eindhoven and Maastricht certainly seem to occupy an advantageous central spot on the map of Europe on the “Fly Away… and come back” page.

X also gives insights and tips to help expats feel more at home not only in the Provinces of Brabant and Limburg, but in the Netherlands as a whole. There’s for example a street interview with Dutch passers-by who explain what makes the HEMA shop such a typical Dutch institution, a list of tricky words in Dutch, like “slim” (it doesn’t mean thin) and “mierenneuker” (not to be translated literally), and a funny quiz testing readers on their knowledge of the Dutch culture: “Are you Dutch proof?”

What I find the most interesting about the magazine is its Southeastern perspective, seen from the Dutch point of view. This may sound strange, but living in the Maastricht region, I must admit that I seldom place myself geographically in reference to Eindhoven. I usually say for example that I live 30 minutes away from Aachen, Liège and Hasselt in the Meuse-Rhine euroregion and one hour away from Brussels, the capital of Europe.

This new magazine shows me yet another way to place myself and makes me realise how much I still can discover about Eindhoven, the “city of light”, and the “top technology” Brainport region.

I now also know that it is possible to travel to Eindhoven entirely by bike, on a 80 km path along the South Willem’s canal (Zuid Willemsvaart ) with “no hills, no traffic lights, and no traffic!” Definitely something to try out.

By Sueli Brodin
Crossroads editor

More information:

X magazine (pdf)

www.brainporttalentregion.com

www.expatguideholland.com

5-7 November 2010: Brainport International Weekend

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Belonging to the IWC and especially to this Group, gave me a real sense of connection to the community. My only regret is that I did not know about the Club sooner as it was a better fit for me personally as I have always enjoyed immersing myself in a new location, rather than being on the periphery. By joining the Club and especially this group, this connection to the community and with individuals intensified and I finally felt that I was a part of life in Maastricht. The fact that there are women who have just moved here, those that are still transitioning, those that have lived here for years, as well as women from the Netherlands creates a unique dynamic that fosters inclusion.

The first group I joined was the Evolution Psychology group as this was part of my past professional experience, but also because I liked the idea of exploring issues more spiritually and through different methodologies. I was not very motivated when I initially signed up as I was at a very low point personally and medically, but Gordana’s gentle contact made it feel safe to come and find out about what happened during a group session. For those of you who were there at the first meeting, thank you for creating an environment of acceptance and openness which I had never experienced before in a group, especially when there is already a relationship between the participants. To Gordana, thank you for saying that you believed in hugs and taking me in your arms the second visit and not letting go until you could feel me relax - I felt like I had found a safe place to be myself and could let go of “trying” to be strong and in control and allow healing to take place.I will miss the group terribly and each of you, individually, as I really looked forward to Thursday mornings, even when I didn’t look forward to anything else.

I wish you contentment, good health, and all the love you want and need.

Jean Lula Quinn

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Thank you Kiyo for sharing your very nice photographs!

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Photos submitted by Ineke van G. Thank you!

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The International Women’s Club South Limburg - 25 Anniversary Party February 27, 2010

Good evening, Friends.

I thought carefully about how to address you this evening and “friends” is the most appropriate; whether of many years’ standing or more recently introduced, every one of you is so much more than a casual acquaintance.

It seems to me that great ideas often occur as a matter of chance; a random combination of circumstances that results in a notion with far-reaching effects.

If Archimedes’ wife hadn’t pointed out to him that he was getting a bit chubby around his nether regions, he wouldn’t have been as concerned with his Body Mass Index as he lowered himself into his bath which means that he wouldn’t have noticed how much of the water slopped over the edge. A Eureka moment would have passed unobserved.

If Isaac Newton’s mother-in-law hadn’t been visiting, he wouldn’t have felt the need for a solitary stroll in the orchard and a little lie-down before going back indoors. That apple would have fallen unnoticed from the tree.

If Mrs. Einstein hadn’t asked her husband to measure the spare room for a new fitted carpet, he never would have come up with E = MC2, E being the edge of the room along the skirting board and M being medium-weight polyester shag.

You see what I mean? Along the same lines: if, 25 years ago, a small group of women hadn’t resolved to get together to start the International Women’s Club, South Limburg, we would all be sitting at home this evening watching inferior TV instead of reveling in each other’s company. The other three founding “mothers”, Nelleke Pruijs, Sathi Basu and Paola Hainebach, all send their love and regrets that they cannot be here this evening but that’s the nature of the IWC, characterized by people forever on the move but knowing that they will always have a place in our hearts.

I shall avoid indulging in a nostalgia fest and there are so many anecdotes linked to those early years but I shall choose one to recount. My favourite has to be the telephone calls I received for months following a newspaper article or flyer which quoted my telephone number, referring to me as the Club’s contact person. For months, a certain gentleman would ‘phone several times a week asking for “an international woman.” He would not accept that I was not running a stable of luscious ladies who could be called on to ease his pain. He was convinced that I was prejudiced against him for one reason or another and only stopped calling when I suggested that he sent along his wife to join us: he was most affronted!

We have many differences which we celebrate but we also have much in common, the most obvious feature being our varied backgrounds and our experience of travel and settling into new environments. In this world of multinationals and careers that demand mobility if we want to succeed, we uproot and move on at regular intervals: we almost literally follow the market. A consequence of this enforced mobility is that the concept of Global Nomads has become a real issue. A Global Nomad is an individual who moves around the world, usually for career purposes, and can eventually end up having no real roots or homeland.
Large companies – or, indeed, smaller ones too, or any institution that thrives on international input - that depend on employees who are global nomads for their success have been made aware of the necessity of keeping these employees happy: a miserable employee is not an efficient, focused employee and , to put it crudely, a poor investment. And what can make an employee miserable? I’ll tell you! A spouse who is lonely, disaffected and home-sick! It doesn’t matter how materially well-off you are as a result of the relocation, if your family is unhappy, then you will be unhappy. The provision of facilities that meet the needs of bored, frustrated and isolated partners is essential if the professional relationship is to prosper.

In addition to offering a haven to the dispossessed spouse, we are also proud of the ever-increasing number of women who have broken through – or are pressing against – that glass ceiling we hear so much about and find themselves alone in a strange and foreign city. The Club welcomes these members with open arms.

The IWC has undoubtedly helped to solve these problems that are infrastructural in terms of what we offer to the Euregio area as well as being personal and demanding of empathy. We have always known this and, quite frankly, I have always believed that hefty financial contributions should have been received over the years from companies that have benefited from our existence! We have prevented by default many a resignation from an international employee whose partner has found herself isolated and unhappy and sees returning to the country of origin as the only way out.

Our value in this capacity was yet again confirmed when members responded to the call for contributions to the 25 year anniversary booklet. The request was to write a few words on “What the IWC means to you”. It means to all of us a safe place to relax and feel valued; a place to meet and make friends; “a nest”; “a warm bath”: metaphors of this sort poured in and are very touching.

A common perception is that we are family. OK, not linked by blood but by respect and affection – just as good, in my opinion. We can count on each other in bad times as well as good – and we have all seen a fair share of both. Our strength lies in each other and in the support and structure we share. We are a hugely talented group of women who deserve to be valued by the world at large as well as each other. Things are getting better. Here’s hoping that I will be wheeled out in another 25 years, waving and smiling like the Queen Mother, to indulge in another bout of self-congratulation on the occasion of our 50th anniversary.

In the meantime, let us continue to take care of each other.

Thank you for your attention.

Carol Herman

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Announcement from the Maastricht Region Branding Foundation website:

We are making headway in improving the climate for the international community in the Maastricht Region. These efforts are being rewarded as the region has two finalists in the Expat Awards 2010: Sueli Brodin is nominated to become Expat of the Year and www.maastrichtregion.com is nominated to become Expat service provider of the year!

On March 23rd the national Awards will be presented. If you believe in the strength of the region, or if you think our efforts are well spent, then please vote for the region by surfing to www.expatoftheyear.nl and bring out your vote for Sueli and for Maastricht Region before March 14th.

Please feel free to forward the message should you know more people who would like to vote.

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“Will’s Will: Shakespeare’s Legacy”, performed by the Amsterdam Chamber Theatre on 12 December 2009 in Maastricht

The ‘December Do’ of 2009 of the International Women’s Club – South Limburg together with the Limburg branch of the Anglo-Dutch Society in Maastricht turned out to be a very successful match. Not only did it bring various international people together, and with them a selection of various, finger-licking, international delicacies - as if each ‘National Honour’ was at stake ! - but also because of the great professionalism of the Amsterdam Chamber Theatre.

IWC and GNE Christmas Dinner

Befitting the international audience of this December evening this formidable theatre threesome consisted of Russian, Dutch and British all-round performers.

The performance added another touch of refined culture to the evening, though just as with Shakespeare’s plays, there were the various levels and layers which were integrated: ranging from almost slapstick to the sublime!

Their singing voices, accompanied only by a guitar, were clear and at times almost ethereal; the close harmony singing was spine-chillingly perfect.

Besides that, the ingenuity, and sometimes simplicity, of the props and clothing changes to enable them to represent another character in one of Shakespeare’s plays were fun to see.

Last but not least, their acting abilities were admirable. With slight changes in facial expressions Frouke Flieringa could change from an elderly Shakespeare into ‘King Lear’ deciding on how to divide his kingdom among his three daughters, putting the analogy with Shakespeare’s division of his inheritance between his own daughters in a different light. Likewise her portrayal of ‘King Richard III’ being tormented by the spirits of those he had murdered was moving; just to name a few of the characters she played.

Will’s Will, Amsterdam Chamber Theatre

Tatiana Kouzovkina’s various character changes in this performance were impressive, from young or old ‘lass’ (Shakespeare’s wife) to young lad at (or even by) a drop of a hat! However, most impressive was her portrayal of Hamlet’s famous soliloquy, the unforgettable, and often misquoted, “To be or not to be”. Her endearing rendition of Hamlet’s pain when uttering his thoughts on suicide, “To be or not to be, that is the question. To die, to sleep no more, …. perchance to dream ..” sent tingling sensations down many people’s backs! You could here a pin drop.

Sophie Rutven-Stuart switched as easily into the role of one of King Lear’s daughters, as into Shakespeare’s doctor, Simon Grow, or into a bawdy type woman, or even a witch, with incredible ease just with a change in accent or expression in her eyes or tone of voice.

Their range of acting moved from hair-raising to the hilarious! It is as if the magic they wove in their persona of one of the three Witches in ‘Macbeth’ had already begun in Part 1: the audience was bewitched into relative silence, only interrupted by some use of cutlery.

Will’s Will, Amsterdam Chamber Theatre

The ACT sure know how to bring a chamber production of one of Britain’s best humanist writers to a broad public in a light and playful way. Now I wonder what their literary creation around Puskin’s ‘Birth of a Poet & Gypsies’, and performance in ‘The Life of Monsieur Molière’ are like? I never knew Chamber Classics could be so compact and so much fun to watch. May their Creative Talents unfold even further, and encompass even more great artists’ literary works.

By Resy Snyders, Chairman of the Anglo-Dutch Society, Limburg branch
Maastricht, 13 December 2009

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The Pink Glove Dance is the latest Internet sensation, and it’s a must-see video for all moms, especially those who have been touched in one way or another by breast cancer. The video, already viewed by more than 1.6 million people, was made by more than 200 hospital staff who let go of all inhibitions and danced their hearts out to raise money for breast cancer.

Source: The Examiner, 1 December 2009

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